I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
