Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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