I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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