Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
