so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
