i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I think a kid would responsible me up
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
