So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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