I'm gonna have a badass scar
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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