I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
