he shaved USA in his pubs
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
