You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
