we have officially lost it.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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