C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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