Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
