***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
