Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
