his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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