So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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