Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
