"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
