I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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