i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
