I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
