just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
they're like a gay fantastic four
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
