Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
