oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Randomize
