At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
