She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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