Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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