Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
