his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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