The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
