I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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