How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
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