its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
