It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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