Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
