Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
