In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You ruined the universe
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
