Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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