ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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