Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
