youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
