...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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