Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
