u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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