Pappa wants mamma naked
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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