You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
