Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
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Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
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I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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