it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize